Rest is for the dead, wake up.

senpai-with-benefits:

malicewondrland:

A few days ago someone told another cashier at the Walmart I work at that I shouldn’t be allowed to be employed because I’m corrupting the children with how I look.. This is what I looked like that day:image

I wish I saw who she was so I could greet her on my day off.. I’ll corrupt her fuckin’ children alright. That’s a promise.

imageWelcome to Walmart, motherfucker.

my mom would actually love you omfg

avatardedpotterhead:

dicksconnected:

i dont understand why guys wont buy tampons because:

  1. NO one thinks theyre for you
  2. actually everyone thinks youre the sweetest person ever and there is a 103% chance i will date u
  3. nobody thinks theyre for you calm the fuck down

4. they’ll probably assume you have a girlfriend

sexuallyactivegrandma:

OH MY GOD

Rooney Mara as Lisbeth Salander in “The Girl With The Dragon Tattoo” (2011)

missespeon:

the-fury-of-a-time-lord:

Two years ago, there was a movie called Paranorman.

image

It didn’t do so good at the box office, despite it being one of the most important, game changing animated movies since the Disney renaissance. It made its money back, but it wasn’t the…

what does your shirt say in yr last selfie?

daddywhorebucks:

i cant believe jesus signed the declaration of independence 2014 years ago god bless america 

handpickedhappiness:

thevoxbox:

charlesoberonn:

giftvvrap:

will you marry me = a marriage proposal
will, you, Mary, me = a foursome proposal

Will you, Mary me = Cavewoman Mary helps Will recover from his Amnesia

Will, you marry me. = Will’s time-traveling partner

And people keep trying to tell me that punctuation isn’t important

congalineofdurin:


toriii-lane:

digitalcrayon:

trashbagtricks:

gaydarjedi:

banesboner:

thank god

*dumps entire bottle of foundation on face*

-eats lipstick-



I’m gonna start wearing makeup in my fucking sleep.





dear god, let it be enough

congalineofdurin:

toriii-lane:

digitalcrayon:

trashbagtricks:

gaydarjedi:

banesboner:

thank god

*dumps entire bottle of foundation on face*

-eats lipstick-

I’m gonna start wearing makeup in my fucking sleep.

dear god, let it be enough